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Dear Jim,

Please paint me the brave little toaster (from the children’s animation film) in bed with two slim sexy soldiers (the bread type), smoking a cigar with used pop tart wrappers strewn across the floor and an empty tub of ‘I cant believe its not butter’ on the side. To the side of the room, an egg has walked in to find the scene and has spurted his yolk everywhere in anger, as the soldiers are HIS bitches. Also note he has matching Marmite curtains and bedsheets with slogan, keeping toast filthy since 1914!

Thanks,

lgh87

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